So the other night I had a nightmare. And it was one of those nightmares that you wake up and don't even want to close your eyes again because you will see the images from it again...and again...and again. I literally woke up gasping for breath and almost (but not quite) sobbing. So I did what I always do when I wake up with a nightmare. I woke up Jason and asked him to cuddle with me, since I feel safe in his arms (insert "awwwww" here). The problem was, he was tired and it was around 2:30 in the morning. So he did roll over and cuddle with me. However, it only lasted about 5 minutes, and I was just getting to the point of being drowsy again, when he rolled back over and went back to sleep. So I was left with no safe arms to fall asleep in and my crazy, mixed up, frightening dream on my mind still.
At that point in time I had two options. The first options was that I could wake Jason back up and have him cuddle with me some more. But I didn't want to do that. I knew that my constant getting up and tossing and turning already made him not sleep well and waking him up twice just because I was scared seems a little selfish. So I decided to take option two. And the next morning I shook my head at my stupidity. Option two should have been option one all along. I prayed.
Now, it might seem a little weird to pray about a nightmare, but this isn't the first time that I've prayed for peace after a dream. The first time was about 6 months or so after Alex passed away. The dream was about Alex. Basically, in my dream, I got a phone call from the hospital saying that Alex was back and perfectly healthy. And they wanted us to go back to the hospital to spend a few nights with him before they sent him home. When I got there, he was in a regular bed and was completely healed and was moving all over the bed while he slept. I remember being upset at the nurses in my dream because they would check on him, walk out of the room, and leave the railing on his bed down. And a couple of times, before I could get it put back up, he would come close to falling out of the bed. I woke up from THAT dream and started crying because it was such a wonderful dream and such a nice feeling, knowing that my son was healthy. But then to have it ripped away when I woke up...I knew that I would dwell on the dream and make myself upset. So I simply asked God to give me peace from the dream. And He did. And I realized that through that dream, I was seeing Alex how he likely is in heaven (perfectly healthy and a typical little boy).
So the other night, my prayer, again, was simple. "Lord give me peace from this dream. Don't let me dwell on it and don't let me have it again." Or something similar to that. Within five minutes, I was back asleep and can not remember if I had anymore dreams that night. And when I woke up in the morning and realized what had happened, I was grateful. I also realized something that we Christians are told all along, but hasn't really hit me until then. God is the only one who will never let you down.
Yes, Jason is a wonderful husband and tries very hard not to let me down, but he is human. And humans can't help but be swayed by their own wants and needs...even if it is unconsciously. No matter how many times you put your faith in a human being to never let you down, he or she will. God is the only one who will NEVER let you down.
Does this mean that your life would be roses, chocolates, and feather beds if you come to Christ. Not at all. In fact the Bible says "I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." (John 16:33) You life will not be easy, but God gives us hope. 1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us "The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure." And 1 Peter 5:10 shares a similar message, "In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation." So even though we will suffer and have trials here on earth, God is faithful and steadfast. He will hold you up when you need help and lift you up when you fall.
Next time you are feeling overwhelmed or in need of someone who won't let you down, try turning to God and praying. He will answer and even if it isn't the answer you were looking for or hoping for, it would be the BEST answer to your problem.
No comments:
Post a Comment