So it's almost to the one year mark of Alex's passing...actually, we just passed the 11 month mark. This is leading me to wonder, will I feel different after September 24? Or will it just be another day? Especially considering that DH and I are now trying to have another baby; will it affect that decision or if I am pregnant already by that time (though I wouldn't know for another week after that...), will it affect my feelings about my next pregnancy.
So....who on earth can I talk to about this, considering the uniqueness of our situation (Alex being sick for so long)?
This is coming about because I just lost one of my Great-Aunts yesterday. My grandma is one of four and 2 of the four spouses have passed away in the last year....One completely unexpected and the other somewhat expected. And with Alex thrown in there, it makes me wonder about mortality.
So that leads me back to my original question...what should I expect next month? Am I going to be holed up the last part of the month dealing with grief I haven't dealt with yet? Or will the 24th be the only day that I'm affected? Either way, I have a feeling that I'm going to be affected no matter what.
